Wednesday 7 January 2009

A letter for you on your most important birthday

Dear Brandon,

        I almost forgot your birthday, until I saw the Birthday Reminder sent to my mailbox two weeks ago. I got two of the Reminders for today, one was yours, and another one was reminding a friend of mine whom I knew since we were in primary school. Same day, but big difference in the conversation to both of you. Time passed, and the day I knew what happened on you was two years and four months ago. I couldn't tell if these 846 days long or short.

        Today, you turn freshly into 21, become an adult. I bet you will say, that you were 21 mentally long time ago. Yes, but from now on, you can step into casino, like most of the fresh 21-year-olds in Malaysia say. If you went back to school for you O Level, I guess you have passed it, and continuing on your A Level, or taking an undergraduate programme, just like me.

        Do you still remember how do we know each other? Yes, Neopets, that kiddy websites. We met in Neoboard, and we decided to form a guild outselves. And you thought me to sign up for multi accounts, which gave me an idea of building a shopping mall in Neopets. Since then, we often chatted in MSN Messenger, and most of it were not related to Neopets, it was about us. You always came in a mischievous attitude, and liked to tell disguisting jokes. To me, you had invented some funny addresses, such as "shitball" or "stinkball"; you did teach me some new English vocabularies too, indirectly. Sometimes, I couldn't chat with you, if I were without my electronic dictionary with me. You spoke fast, you typed fast, and you used varied words. Those Chinese pinyin you typed, always made me laugh. I guess, the word you used the most was "pian tai". Haha, you always had problem with those beautiful body art I displayed as my avatar in MSN Messenger, and then you will make joke of it.

        I miss those days so much, that you cheered me up and encourage me from my depression and upset in the college life of New Era College, because you knew me well. I thought you were sombody sophisticated and early-mature, and take you as a precious friend; whenas, I didn't know that we were same kind of people. You knew me, and I knew you, as least we understand each other's circumstances. It made you even more precious than before, that no on else on earth understand my circumstances, but you.

        You proposed a meeting at Genting. For the first time, I promised you, but I let you down. I was so sorry about that, but I guess you could understand my position as a daughter, and my parents' feelings. I always thought there will be other chances to meet up, you know? Then, you proposed to meet in that December, before your school open. I was looking forward to it. Although I don't and won't ride the rollercoaster, but I could wait for you down there; and we could have fun with Motion Master. You could show me your martial art, and you could carry on with your disguisting jokes. I could imagine that you would keep on talking, non-stop, and I'll listen, like we had known each other for a very long time.

        All that fantasies had became a dream on Andy Lau's birthday on 2006, with your father online in MSN Messenger. I was shocked, so shocked, and that made me missed Mdm. Soo Yuen Tien's class. From your father, I knew it was few days after our conversation in MSN. Was it because I didn't online? This question has been in my mind. It was just eight days, and I couldn't understand why was there such a dramatical change. Was it because I were busying on studies, and didn't online? I thought Lithium Carbonate and Zyprexa Olanzapine helped you?

        Couldn't meet at Genting is a regret, and the incident is my lost. You are my precious friend, and I'll keep that in the bottom of my heart. I thank you for all those prayers, and those time we spent together. I still remember the song you like the most was Glenn Frey's The One You Love, and I'm playing you this song.

        Happy Birthday, may Jesus will send you my words.

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